" witless "

 [ "witlessism" ]

1: witlessism (wit less iz em) NOUN. A failed attempt to sound wise or clever.

  * e.g.,  ... "I'm telling you there's an enemy that would like to attack America, Americans, again. There just is. That's the reality of the world. And I wish him all the very best." -George W. Bush, Jan. 12, 2009 "I've been in the Bible every day since I've been the president." -George W. Bush, Nov. 12, 2008 "It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way." -George W. Bush, April 28, 2005 "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." -George W. Bush, Aug. 5, 2004 Are good examples of witlessisms. 

 [ "Witless Dishcloth" ]

1: 'Witless Dishcloth' is a derogatory term used to insult someone when they are being obnoxious and time-wasting. This phrase was coined by James May on the first episode of season three of the Amazon Prime Exclusive and Original, The Grand Tour.

  * e.g.,  ... 1st example (origin): I just wanna say, Hammond, you witless dishcloth! 

 [ "witless bitch" ]

1: One who finds themself very funny, though no else around them does.

  * e.g.,  ... Gina is a witless bitch; she's the only one that laughs at her "jokes". 

 [ "Jehovah's Witless" ]

1: A derogatory nickname for a Jehovah's Witness, refering to the apparent witless, clueless and lamebrain beliefs (as percieved by normal persons) of the church dogma and its members.

  * e.g.,  ... Do you Jehovah's Witlesses always dress like dorks or are these just your Sunday-go-to-meeting clothes? 

 [ "Jehovah Witless" ]

1: Selectively telling people you've converted right around Christmas so you receive lots of presents but don't give any

  * e.g.,  ... Dan tried to pull a Jehovah Witless on everybody so his present from me is gonna be a log of shit in a box 

 [ "witless cunt" ]

1: a cunt of the witless variety.

  * e.g.,  ... He put half a g of ketamine up his nose for breakfast. What a witless cunt. 

 [ "witless cunt" ]

2: Someone who does unbelievably stupid things with no knowledge of their own stupidity.

 [ "witless fucking cocksplat" ]

1: a funny Fuckface von Clownstick insult coined by the Scots. others include incompressible jizzvon Clownsticket, Mangled apricot hellbeast, and others

  * e.g.,  ... used by brexit scotland when fuckface von clownstick was visiting scotland.they were calling him a witless fucking cocksplat 

 [ "Witless Protection Program" ]

1: Witless Protection Program (wit less pro tek shun pro gram) NOUN. An organization devoted to saving clueless people from the consequences of their stupidity.

  * e.g.,  ... Molly- Did you just threaten to kill the president? Conrad- No, I said he's going to get shot. Molly- How would you know? Conrad- He's GOT to, nobody's going to stand for Obama giving a million dollars to every black person in the country! Molly- What makes you think he's going to do that? Conrad- Oh it's obvious. You know the way all those blacks work together. (she scribbles something on a scrap of paper). Molly- You are going to need this number. Conrad- Who's this? Molly- That's the number for the Witless Protection Program. 

 [ "witless protection program" ]

1: When your friends have more comebacks and sarcasm than you. Also, you have no comeback at all or strain to say something, but something stupid and useless comes out. Not so witty, go to the back of the class. Another word for "you suck".

  * e.g.,  ... Witless: "I wish I'd said that." 

 [ "Witless" ]

1: To lack wit.

  * e.g.,  ... John is so witless when he tells a joke.