" resumes "

 [ "resume" ]

1: it's a document with which the employer cleans his ass after you leave it with him,generally after an interview

  * e.g.,  ... leave your resume on the desk,i'll take a look at it 

 [ "Resume" ]

1: Resume is the opposite of the slang Pause. If you or someone else say anything weird like homosexual, instead of saying pause and meaning you do not claim the homosexual energy, you say resume to say you DO claimed the homosexual energy.

  * e.g.,  ... Guy 1: "Yo yesterday I sucked the shit out of a lollypop." 

 [ "Resumate" ]

1: (verb) To check out someone's background before deciding to get involved intimately.

  * e.g.,  ... If he resumates well, I might just green light him to my honey pot. 

 [ "Resume" ]

1: The positive physical (or other) attributes of a hottie that has it all working. A way to say, "She's gorgeous, and also has it all together " Comes from the business world where calling someone a "hot bitch" would definitely get you canned.

  * e.g.,  ... Office Guy #1: Did you see that new girl in marketing? 

 [ "resume" ]

1: Your face/facial expression

  * e.g.,  ... Don't be hatin...don't look good on yo'resume 

 [ "Resumeable" ]

1: An action or responsibility that would improve your resume. This can be applied to any number of actions, big or small.

  * e.g.,  ... Matt, you've got some mad memo writing skills. I bet that's resumeable. 

 [ "Resume" ]

1: The term used when upholding a street basketball game (or a backyard baseball game during a season), then calling time-in. (Use only around white folks)

  * e.g.,  ... "Damn negro, I'm have to tie my shoe.......Aight...Resume." 

 [ "resume blindness" ]

1: When somebody's impressive credentials cause other people to overlook their negative qualities.

  * e.g.,  ... I can't believed that he screwed his new girlfriend in my bed. He hadn't even broken up with me. Really? Everyone wondered what you were doing with such a narcissistic asshole. Plus he was a cokehead. What did you see in him? Well, we went to a good prep school and to an ivy league business school and worked for a prestigious investment bank on Wall Street. I never imagined that somebody like that could be so insensitive and cruel. Hon, you are suffering from resume blindness. He's a jerk and an emotional midget. Get over him. 

 [ "resume padding" ]

1: A requirement to obtain admission to most top universities at both the undergraduate and graduate level. Involves spinning remedial job responsibilities as key managerial roles, single-day volunteer experiences as transformational accomplishments, and web sites created in 10 hours or less as ingenious entrepreneurial ventures. Known to induce gag reflexes amongst millenials, and hard-ons amongst baby boomers.

  * e.g.,  ... Percy Buckington graduated with a 5 GPA and had never actually worked a day in his life. But with proper resume padding, he was able to convince the committee that his trip to the most luxurious resort in Nigeria was a major humanitarian venture, and he had the web site to prove it. He was thus able to gain acceptance to almost every top MBA program. 

 [ "google resume" ]

1: The first page of results that comes up when a person's name is put into google.

  * e.g.,  ... I should have checked this guy's google resume before I hired him.