" playlands "

 [ "Puppy Playland" ]

1: AKA "Meltal Playland" (termed after the dumbass boss's spelling error) Gnarliest place to work in the world. You could say its a doggy daycare, but it is so much more. A typical day consists of waking up early to clean up more soft serve shits than there are dogs.

  * e.g.,  ... My date cancelled dinner with me because I smelled like shit after a nine hour shift at Puppy Playland. 

 [ "Puppy Playland" ]

2: Jim, the boss, is a dumbass who can't spell, and who ends every sentence with the word "Ummmm....."

 [ "Puppy Playland" ]

3: Ginny, the co-manager, is an old lady who obviously used to be a prostitute. She is in the habit of asking every question at least four times before she is satisfied, a habit most likely learned from dirty talk in bed.

 [ "Puppy Playland" ]

4: We get some crazy employees. Tamara, for example, bought a Hummer for her ugly ass little white dog with a license plate reading "4RUFFLS". She believes her dog loves the place, and so she tortures it every day by bringing it in. Tamara's boob job tries its best to make up for her lack of intelligence, but, sadly, fails.

 [ "Puppy Playland" ]

5: The day continues with fun games such as "Spray Ruffles with the pressure hose," and "See if your coworker will clean up the shit you take when they aren't looking." Ninja employees sometimes scale the walls with ease to retrieve long lost balls.

 [ "Puppy Playland" ]

6: The place smells like shit, looks like shit, and tastes like shit, but can be be legitimately respected by those who have come to know it.

 [ "Utopian Playland" ]

1: A society whose top priority is to have fun.

  * e.g.,  ... Join toysoldiersunite.com to help transform this world into a utopian playland! 

 [ "Puppy Playland" ]

1: A place where if you park in the front parking lot, your car will be hit by a dog trainer named "Sandy"

  * e.g.,  ... I got hit by a scion at puppy playland. 

 [ "Puppy Playland" ]

1: AKA "Meltal Playland" (termed after the dumbass bosse's spelling error) Gnarliest place to work in the world. A typical day consists of waking up early to clean up more soft serve shits than there are dogs. Jim, the boss, is a dumbass who can't spell, and who ends every sentence with the word "Ummmm....." It smells like shit, looks like shit, and tastes like shit. Ninja employees sometimes scale the wall to retrieve lost balls.

  * e.g.,  ... My date cancelled dinner with me because I smelled like shit after a nine hour shift at Puppy Playland.