" procedures "

 [ "procedure" ]

1: Defined by Gina Linetti as just a fancy word for 'proper order to do things'. It's a Brooklyn 99 joke, y'all.

  * e.g.,  ... Rosa: We followed procedure. 

 [ "a procedure" ]

1: Code phrase used when a woman needs to have an abortion; usually used to hide the fact that she is going in for the operation to mixed company.

  * e.g.,  ... Girl, I won't be going to the club tomorrow night, I gotta rest up cause I'm having a procedure the day after next. 

 [ "Seizure Procedure" ]

1: In video games, when you are struck or exposed by a weapon or mechanic that causes blindness in your character. examples: flashbangs, concussion grenades, blinding flashlights, etc.

  * e.g.,  ... I was on a killstreak until Ajax hit me with the Seizure Procedure and i died. 

 [ "Procedure Town" ]

1: A term used by workers, usually in minimum wage jobs, who deliberately follow work place procedures to the letter in order to slow down the functioning of the business and annoy managers.

  * e.g.,  ... "Fuck this place, I'm going downtown to procedure town." 

 [ "reprisal procedure" ]

1: Noun.

  * e.g.,  ... "Debbie - did you notice Dr. Leibowitz ordered a full colorectal exam on the guy who came in for eight stiches across his forehead?" 

 [ "reprisal procedure" ]

2: A unnecessary, usually invasive, humiliating and painful medical test ordered by a physician to get even with an unruly or disruptive patient.

  * e.g.,  ... "Yeah, during admission, the patient called Dr. Leibowitz a money-grubbing Jew. It sounds like a reprisal procedure to me. Excuse me. Dr. Leibowitz has asked me to mix parking lot gravel with the K-Y Jelly." 

 [ "Dental Procedure" ]

1: A discreet reference to oral sex or oral copulation of someone’s genitals, fart box or other erogenous zone. Usually a good old fashioned throat fucking.

  * e.g.,  ... I met that dirty whore in the parking garage and gave her a dental procedure. She told me to get on my knees and the next think I know she was doing a dental procedure on my taut little rosebud. 

 [ "Procedure 85" ]

1: after surprising a chick with your cum in her eye, slap her with your dick.

  * e.g.,  ... i procedure 85'd a girl last night. 

 [ "Procedure WTF" ]

1: when your bitch is going down and your about to cum, you pull your dick out with such force that it flings towards your stomach and you skeet in your own eye.

  * e.g.,  ... JESUS CHRIST! I PROCEDURE WTF'D MYSELF LAST NIGHT AND IT HURT LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER! I HAD TO GO TO THE OPTOMETRIST! 

 [ "D Procedure" ]

1: D Procedure is as follows:

  * e.g.,  ... Matticoor didn't follow D Procedure, so he got diablimblimbsaphumphalis. 

 [ "D Procedure" ]

2: An Eltomentoquackquack

  * e.g.,  ... Wangers followed D Procedure but still isn't cured of his blimblimbs. 

 [ "D Procedure" ]

3: Followed by a Winkballs

 [ "D Procedure" ]

4: And on a good day, a Brow Brush

 [ "D Procedure" ]

5: Without D Procedure, or if any part of it is done without the rest of the steps IN ORDER, you risk catching a case of Diablimblimbsaphumphalis, which can only be cured by a Blinkballs or Lyme.

 [ "procedural chess" ]

1: The weaponisation of an administration apparatus such that the opposing party or parties must navigate a sea of bureaucratic red tape in order to proceed with requisite business.

  * e.g.,  ... Dorothea has a grievance with her doctor's office, but the procedural chess of submitting a complaint has left her stunned; she may just forget about the whole endeavour.